This is an old letter from one of our first adoption search clients way back in 1995:
After two months of searching, I have finally made contact with my birth parents and their families. It started last Thursday and I met my birth father and his wife the very next day! We spent a day in Palm Springs and got along great. I’ve spoken to my paternal grandparents on the phone and they told me that when I was born, they made an agreement with my mother and maternal grandparents to take me and raise me, but when they showed up at the hospital to take me home, my maternal grandparents had changed their mind and opted for adoption. How sad, huh?
My maternal grandmother was very emotional when I talked to her on the phone and I really lost all control of my emotions, too. I feel my grandmother carries a lot of guilt, but she is the sweetest, warmest person. My paternal grandparents are equally warm and emotional and just have really big hearts. I was happy to hear that I was not kept a secret and that I was discussed openly and regularly and thought of throughout the years; my paternal grandmother wears a charm bracelet with all her grandkids names and birthdates engraved on the charms - and she’s had one for me all this time!! Not having a name for me, they all just called me “the baby.”
So, I finally heard from my birth mom on Sunday and spoke to her again yesterday. We talked for about three hours both days and got along well. She married my father after I was born and they had two more children, so I have a full brother and sister!!! They later divorced and my father and his new wife raised the kids. She was very emotional and explained that her wounds never really healed. I just kept bawling my head off because I felt so bad for her. She was only 15 years old when I was born and basically had no choice but to give me up. She told me that she wants me in her life and is flying up to see me next week and then we will drive together back to her house to spend Thanksgiving, where I will get to meet all of my relatives.
Everything has happened so fast, but I have to say that persistence really pays off. I feel so lucky to have found my birth family - I just couldn’t have asked for a better outcome. Of course, there is some excellent ingenuity here, and that is the Private Investigators at Research, Etc. that I hired to help me. Those of you who are at a total loss or just frustrated with your search, I urge you to contact Research Etc. at 1-800-992-3571 or by E-Mail. They became so involved in my search and and were all emotional, too, when they finally found my family!! I can honestly say that they really love what they do and are stellar P.I.’s. The best thing about it is that they allowed me to be actively involved, too. I made a lot of the phone calls and even sent a friend to do some research for me, and they never discouraged me from doing that.
I am very exhausted from this search, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Good luck to all of you who are still searching - and never give up, no matter what!
Love and best wishes to all,